Cries for Haiti

I've lived through plenty of catstrophes in my life, from 9/11...to Katrina... To tsunamis and terrorist attacks... But never have I lived through one that effected my emotions to the point where I cried, literally. But this earthquake in Haiti has changed all of that. Maybe part of it is growing up, maybe part of it is becoming a Christian who hurts when other people hurt, maybe it's because I know that hundreds of thousands of people that never knew Jesus as their savior are now gone, and the though of where that brings them makes me sick. I can't pinpoint it dirrectly, but I know that as I think about this, or here something or watch something on the news, I just start to literally cry and it just breaks my heart. It's emotionally draining to see the death toll rise. I have spent most of the last 48 hours crying out and wondering 'God, why would you allow this'? Yet I get no answer.

Maybe my heart has changed to be less about me and more about others. I would love nothing more right now then to go. To leave my jobs and everything I have here and just go to Haiti and spend all of my time and effort doing everything and anything to help these people. It is honestly the one desire of my heart right now, and of I could find a way to afford it, I would already be gone. The only problem is that I can't afford to leave and need to work to pay my bills. Ah welcome to life. But the desire of my heart is to be there and hopefully I can go and help with relief efforts at some point in the future. Until then I pray, and I cry for hope, I cry for a nation, and I cry that God does a work in a place that knows not of him.



I have for months prayed for a HEART that breaks over the things that break God's own heart. I can only imagine how his heart must be breaking as I realize that he is answering that prayer and truly giving me a heart that has just begun to break for the hurt, pain, and suffering I witness.