Is GOD turning me into the man I'm supposed to be?

I can only hope the title of this is what is coming true. I want to be used to impact those around me. I am so happy from what he has taught me through everyone around me.

I have had a change of heart I have begun to pray for my (future)wife. It's something that I thought about a couple weeks ago that I had read in a book somewhere. Whenever I feel alone, whenever the feelings for her come back, I just have to pray for whoever my wife will be, and pray the God will keep her in his hands and for me until the time is right. It's so hard sometimes though. I just want the feelings for her to go away, and they have to an extent , but they are still there at times and sometimes I act so impatient. I expect feelings since February to go away in minutes, I expect someone who I thought about all the time, to just be someone I don't think about. It's not like that, but we are progressing in that direction.

I'm glad that the way I felt about her have not ruined our friendship but I feel like our friendship is actually better than ever before, because of the fact that it's all out in the open and I'm no longer sitting there "pulling flower petals" as it were.


I heard the idea of praying for my wife from I THINK the book, "Every Young Man's Battle" as well as this idea that also came from Harris' book where he says "Gentlemen, are you kind of friend to the girls in your life that you will one day hear from their husbands, 'thank you for being a brother to my wife'?

So anyways... I googled the topic and found this other blog OTHER BLOG

and found on it the following which I couldn't agree with more "I pray for my future wife. I cannot wait to worship You with her in my arms….at my side. I cannot wait to passionately pursue You with her in the midst of my tears. Jesus, I pray for my marriage. Ohh, the pain of today’s North American mindset of marriage and statistics. Jesus, I’m in complete wonder how you’ve given me such a beautiful wife. Help us to seek you out in praying together, reading the word together, being one in your spirit together. I ask, oh Lord, how did I deserve such a blessing?!? You indeed are good. God- Help me to pursue you in righteousness. Help in the midst of my impurities. I need you more than ever in this time of seperation. "

I love how the prayer is like, he's praying FOR her, and that its like halfway through (the part in bold) he's suddenly married to her, and praying for her as he always has been




Ok Im done